Choosing an engagement ring is one of the few purchases where you're buying something you hope will be worn every day for fifty years — usually without being able to ask the person who'll wear it. It's no wonder people find it daunting.
The good news is that it's far simpler than the internet makes it look. You need to settle four things: your budget, the style, the stone, and the size. Everything else is detail that a good jeweller will handle with you.
We've been helping people through this in Dorchester since 2013, and this guide is essentially the conversation we have across the counter most weeks — written down, in order.
Start with your budget, and ignore the old rule
You may have heard that you should spend three months' salary. That figure came from a mid-century advertising campaign, not from tradition, etiquette or good sense. Nobody is keeping score.
A far more useful approach is to decide the number you're genuinely comfortable with first, then design the ring around it. There are beautiful engagement rings at £600 and beautiful engagement rings at £16,000, and the difference between them is not how much they're loved.
A few practical points on budget:
- Spending less on the setting leaves more for the stone. A simple, well-made solitaire mount puts every penny into the diamond.
- A slightly smaller stone of better quality usually looks better than a larger stone with visible inclusions or a dull, tinted body colour.
- Payment can be spread. We offer Klarna at checkout, and we run a deposit system for customers who'd rather reserve a piece and pay it off over time.
- Old gold counts towards it. Inherited pieces you'll never wear can be part-exchanged against the ring, which is one of the most underused ways to stretch a budget.
Work out the style before you worry about the stone
Style is the thing your partner will notice from across a room. Stone quality is the thing they'll appreciate for decades. Get the style right first.
If you're guessing, look at the jewellery they already wear. Yellow or white metal? Delicate or bold? Plain or decorative? People are remarkably consistent, and their existing jewellery is the most honest brief you'll ever get.
The main shapes to know:
Solitaire. One stone, usually round brilliant, on a plain band. The default for a reason — it's timeless, it suits every hand, and it sits neatly against a wedding band later.
Three stone. Often described as representing past, present and future. Gives noticeably more width and sparkle than a solitaire of the same total weight, and it's currently very much back in fashion.
Halo. A centre stone encircled by small diamonds, which makes the centre read considerably larger than it is. Excellent value per visual impact.
Cluster. Several stones arranged to form one flowering shape. Common in antique pieces and a lovely alternative if you want something less obviously "modern engagement ring".
Vintage and Art Deco styles. Geometric lines, milgrain edging, engraved shoulders. If your partner's taste runs to the unusual, this is where to look — and we've written a fuller guide on what defines Art Deco jewellery if you'd like the background.
You can see the full range in our engagement ring collection.
New, lab-grown or antique?
This is the decision that most affects what you get for your money, and it's the one people least often think about before they start shopping. All three are legitimate choices — they just suit different priorities.
New. Modern manufacturing, current styles, and a ring nobody has worn before. Straightforward, and the easiest to match with a wedding band later.
Lab-grown diamonds. Chemically and optically identical to mined diamonds, graded on exactly the same scale, and typically a great deal cheaper for the same size and quality. If carat weight matters most to you, this is how you get more of it. The trade-off worth knowing: lab-grown stones generally don't hold resale value the way natural diamonds do, so think of them as something to wear rather than an asset. Our lab-grown diamond collection is the place to start.
Antique and pre-owned. Our own particular speciality. You get craftsmanship that's difficult to buy new at the same price, genuinely distinctive design, and stones cut by hand in an era before machines standardised everything. Old mine cuts and old European cuts throw a softer, warmer, more candlelit fire than a modern brilliant — some people prefer it enormously. It's also the most environmentally sensible option, since nothing new has been mined or made. Browse our antique and pre-owned jewellery, spanning Georgian through to Art Deco.
If you've inherited something and want to know roughly when it was made, our guide to identifying the era of antique jewellery will help.
The 4Cs, without the rabbit hole
Diamonds are graded on cut, colour, clarity and carat. You can spend weeks reading about this. Here's what actually matters in practice:
Cut is the one that counts. It governs how the stone handles light, and it's the difference between a diamond that flashes across a room and one that looks flat. If you have to compromise on something, don't compromise here.
Colour runs from D (colourless) down through the alphabet. Most people cannot see the difference between D and G without a comparison stone sitting next to it. Buying at G–H rather than D–E frees up a surprising amount of budget. Warmer stones also look lovely in yellow gold, where a faint tint reads as richness rather than a flaw.
Clarity describes internal inclusions. The relevant question isn't the grade on the certificate — it's whether you can see anything with the naked eye. A stone graded SI1 that's clean to the eye looks identical, on a hand, to one graded VVS1 that costs considerably more.
Carat is weight, not size. Two stones of equal weight can look different sizes depending on how they're cut. And prices jump sharply at round numbers — a 0.90ct stone often looks indistinguishable from a 1.00ct one and costs meaningfully less.
If you'd like to see the difference between grades rather than read about it, bring the question into the shop. Ten minutes with stones in front of you is worth more than any amount of reading.
Getting the ring size right
This is the part people panic about, and it's the easiest to fix.
The reliable trick: borrow a ring she already wears on the correct finger and bring it in — we can measure it in seconds. Failing that, ask a friend, sister or mother. They usually know, and they are usually delighted to be asked.
If you're working entirely blind, our ring sizing chart will get you close, and it's better to buy slightly large than slightly small. Most rings can be adjusted afterwards through our resizing and repairs service — though very intricate antique settings and full eternity bands have limits, so ask before you commit.
What to check before you buy
Whatever you choose, a few things are worth confirming:
- Certification for the centre stone, where one exists — particularly for larger diamonds.
- A UK hallmark. Gold items over 1 gram, platinum over 0.5 grams and silver over 7.78 grams must be hallmarked by law. It confirms the metal is what it's claimed to be.
- The condition of the setting. On older rings, worn claws are the single most common issue, and the reason stones are lost. They're straightforward to rebuild — but you want to know before, not after.
- An up-to-date valuation for insurance. Most home insurers require individual items above a certain value to be specified. We provide written jewellery valuations.
If you can't find it, have it made
Occasionally someone comes in with a very clear picture in their head and nothing on the shelf quite matches it. That's what our bespoke design service is for — designing a piece from scratch, or reworking stones from an inherited ring into something that will actually be worn.
Redesigning a grandmother's diamonds into a new setting is one of the most rewarding things we do, and it carries a meaning that nothing bought off a shelf can match.
Come and see them in person
Photographs are useful for narrowing things down. They are hopeless for deciding. Sparkle, scale and how a ring sits on a hand simply do not translate to a screen — nearly everyone who visits us ends up choosing something different from what they'd shortlisted online, and almost always something they're happier with.
You're welcome to browse with no pressure at all, or you can book an appointment with Sandy for unhurried, private time with the collection. If you're planning a surprise, tell us — we're well practised at discretion.
Jordans Jewellers 29 South Street, Dorchester, Dorset, DT1 1BY 01305 250413 · enquiries@jordansjewellers.co.uk Monday to Saturday, 9:30am – 4:30pm
An independent, female-owned jeweller in the heart of Dorchester since 2013 — winners of Dorchester Retail Business of the Year 2026 and Gold for Outstanding Customer Service in both the Dorchester and West Dorset awards 2025.
Frequently asked questions
How much should you spend on an engagement ring?
As much as you're comfortable with, and no more. The "three months' salary" figure originated in advertising rather than tradition. Most of our customers spend somewhere between £1,000 and £5,000, but we sell rings well below and well above that range, and the ring's meaning has nothing to do with its price. [Confirm this range reflects your actual spread before publishing.]
Are lab-grown diamonds a good choice for an engagement ring?
Yes, if you want maximum size and sparkle for your budget. They're identical to mined diamonds in chemistry, appearance and grading. The main consideration is that they tend not to hold resale value in the way natural diamonds do, so they're best seen as something to wear and enjoy rather than as an investment.
Is it acceptable to buy a second-hand or antique engagement ring?
Completely — and it's increasingly popular. Antique rings offer craftsmanship, individuality and value that are hard to match in a new piece, and buying one is the most sustainable option available, since no new material has been mined. Every pre-owned ring we sell is checked and prepared by us before it goes on display.
How do I find out her ring size without her knowing?
Borrow a ring she already wears on that finger and bring it to us to measure — it takes seconds and costs nothing. Alternatively, ask a close friend or family member. If you truly can't, buy slightly large: most rings can be resized afterwards.
Can I use an old ring or unworn gold towards a new one?
Yes. We buy gold and offer part-exchange against anything in the collection, which is one of the simplest ways to increase your budget. We can also redesign inherited stones into an entirely new ring through our bespoke service.
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